Home is where the heart is
Some say the Bible mentions “Do not be afraid” 365 times, a verse for every day of the year. These days, there are many things that I can remind myself not to be afraid of.
This Monday, Zach was supposed to get chemo, but his platelets were too low, so the doctor decided to delay a week. “Do not be afraid” and “Do not be anxious” repeat in my mind. The amount of fear and anxiety that lives within my body at any given moment is more than I have ever experienced.
When our lives changed drastically a year and a half ago, our wants and needs shifted - my wants and needs shifted. It was an exciting change when I moved to Connecticut from San Diego 14 years ago. Zach and I were starting our married lives together in a new place, just the two of us, and we created a life we loved. Even though I missed being around my side of the family, my home is where Zach is. Our family (the three of us) was and is our priority, and when Zach was diagnosed, my heart grew more eager to be around my siblings and parents. I yearned for more family support. Over the last 6-12 months, Zach and I have talked about moving and all the things that go into moving. We talked about what it would look like if we moved, where we would move, and how it would affect all parts of our lives and those close to us. We had settled on making it a priority to try to move next summer (2025). However, things have shifted, and we are moving to Texas this summer, specifically Royse City. We are trying to set ourselves up to be closer to more family and MD Anderson if the need arises for clinical trials.
Zach will continue his role at ESPN, and Silas is looking forward to being closer to his cousins and playing baseball outside most of the year.
The stress of moving is real, and I have felt all the feelings - from excited to paralyzed.
We plan on having at least one going-away party or perhaps two. Details will be announced when we have more clarity on Silas’s All-Stars baseball schedule. Yes, we did plan the closing date on our house around the possibility of him playing on the All-Stars team. We couldn’t be more excited for him to have the opportunity to play one last baseball season in Avon.
While we feel strongly that this is the right move for our family, it is also bittersweet. We will deeply miss those who made Connecticut feel like home when we arrived and who have been such a meaningful part of our lives here. We very much look forward to seeing as many people in person as possible before we leave for Texas.